Power of "The Ask"

Just when he was ready to pack it in... quit the group.
Just when he felt he had nothing to offer...
questioned why he'd joined in the first place, he asked us,
"Should I even be in this group, what do I have to offer?"

His humbleness told me we had the right guy leading the group.
I rallied to his side. You have something I want...
the ability to be vulnerable... the ability to risk...
the ability to ask. I was impressed with his bravery.

There is huge power in "The Ask", and I am learning
to ask in every aspect of my life. At work I ask a collegue
"what skills do I have that can benefit this project?",
I ask another "Can you help me with this powerpoint presentation?"
In my personal life I ask a friend "can you help me organize
my basement?"

In his book The Success Principles: How to Get from Where
You Are to Where You Want to Be, Jack Canfield talks about
"The Ask". In his chapter Ask! Ask! Ask! Jack says, "You have nothing
to lose and everything to gain by asking. To be successful you have
to take risks, and one of the risks is the willingness to risk rejection."

The old saying goes "Don't ask if you're afraid of the answer"
I guess I was always afraid of the answer.

There is a feeling of exhileration and hopefulness when I do
"The Ask". And I'm learning that people like to be asked.
People like to contribute, teach and support others. Like the thrill
of finding a Purie on the ground while collecting marbels as a kid,
I am now revelling in the joy of collecting yes-es to my asks.

Since I have been doing "The Ask" (five months now), I have not been
turned down once. Am I taking advantage of asking? Definetly not.
I treat it like special underwear that I only take out for special occassions.

Start asking today. Tell me how you make out with "The Ask."

Chocolate Helps

First week of the new job under my belt. Happy it was a short week. A complete roller coaster ride inside my head trying to sort out the personalities, the changes and my emotions. Been carrying my
Enhancing Emotional Intelligence book with me and reading it faithfully at lunch and breaks.

Have come to the realization that I don't handle change very well, at least change I haven't any control over. I've been journalling and talking with Frank and friends. Talking has helped tremendously... Talk is a new thing for me.

After weeks of stress about the move to the new position and an intense desire to take flight instead of fight, I feel exhausted.

Usually I crawl into a hole and keep digging down and down and down... Attempting to do things differently this time. It's a hell of a lot of work. I am equal to this challenge.

...and chocolate helps.

My Monkey

I just pulled a monkey, out of my bathtub drain.

At least that's what my brother called it a few years back,
when he pulled one out of my bachelorette-pad sink.

I was single for those 5 minutes,
and didn't have a man to unclog drains.
He was reeling from a life askew
and needed somewhere to go.
We laughed until we cried
each time he said "Monk-key",
and I think we re-connected that day.

So I hold my monkey high in the bathroom light,
marveling at its suspended soap scum,
and hairy slime, and I smile.